I met up with Dick Ballsey, Ambiguously Disgruntled Publications Sports Editor, for lunch Wednesday. He had already staked out a table in the bar, being served by the best-looking waitress in the joint, and was already through his first cigarrette and half-way through his first Scotch.

�It�s not a beer lunch today?� I asked.

�No, this is serious business, kid, you know what I want to discuss. We�re having a Scotch lunch.�

I wasn�t one to disagree, and he politely waited until I�d had my first sip.

�Look, you�re going to put this World Cup Column in the Manifesto, whether you think you should or not� because you Want to. Tell me I�m wrong.�

If there is one thing ol� Richard is, it�s astute. I�ve never felt like rambling on about sports is what the Manifesto is supposed to be about, but then again, the constant vitriol emanating from Dr. Jake�s , our socia-political commentator, keyborad was getting a bit straining. Beyond that, I liked sports, I liked writing about sports, I liked reading about sports, and I�d always argued with myself whether the Manifesto was supposed to be what I Wanted to say, or what I though people would like to read. I decided the column was going in� However, when it�s lunch with Dick, and especially when it�s a Scotch lunch with Dick, cantankerous arguing is in play, and I wanted to make him work for it.

�Well� I wouldn�t say you�re Wrong, I�m just not sure anyone is going to Care about a long-winded World Cup rant.�

�This is no rant, this is solid journalism, and when my predictions turn out correct, you�ll thank me.�

First of all, the phrase �serious journalism� and Dick Ballsey should never be in the same Room, but I didn�t care, I was going to force the World Cup down everyone�s throats, and I didn�t care if no one reads it.

So here it is, in all It�s glorious� glory.

Before we get into the group-by-group breakdown, let�s take a quick look at the 6 favorites: traditional World Cup powers Brazil, Italy, Argentina, and Germany (a collective 12 Cups, out of 16) and Defending Champs France, along with England. Here are my picks, in order of likelihood to win the whole damn thing.

1) Argentina: My official pick to win it all. They seem to grow World-Class strikers down there alongside their famous beef. Talent is no issue with this side� in fact, they have so much talent it IS an issue, as seemingly the only thing holding them back is finding the best 11, which is so often a deceptively tricky task, considering the importance of chemistry over flat talent. Gabriela Batistuta is as great a striker as exists on the planet over the last 6 or more years, always near the top of the goal tables in Italy�s elite Serie A league. However, succumbing to injury as of late has meant that countryman Hernan Crespo has taken over his role, not only as Serie A�s leading scorer, but Argentina�s as well. They �cruised,� or came as close to �cruising� as one can in the brutal South American qualifying (how tough? Colombia, currently ranked 4th in the FIFA rankings, was NOT one of the 5 South American qualifiers!!!) by winning the region.


2) England: This is a bit of a stretch� okay, this is a REAL stretch, but call it a hunch. The Godfathers of Football have �shockingly�only won one Cup, and the soccer-mad nation just seems due. They had a rough go of it in qualifying � but everyone seems to in Europe � and Pop-icon David Beckham may or may not be back from a broken foot suffered in an April club match. Beyond that, they drew the �Group of Death� along with Argentina (more on that later) and may not even survive the first round. But� talent is no question on this team� it never is, but they do seem to have that �finding the best 11� problem that plagues so many National Sides. For some reason, they have a Swedish manager � Sven-Goran Errikson (who could be named to the �All Sterotypical Scandanavian Name team�) which is interesting, given that Sweden is also in the �Group of Death.�

3) Brazil: Picking Brazil to win the World Cup is about like picking one of Roger Penske�s cars to win the Indy 500. The only four time Cup winner, it is notable when they Don�t at least make the semifinals. Ronaldo, the world-class striker who led the contigent to a runner-up finish in France four years ago, is back. The problem is the side is considered a lot less talented than the glorious Brazillian teams of the past, who invented �The Beautiful Game,� and some wonder if the talent pool is drying up, with skillful play being replaced by physicality. Of course, it bears noting, complaining about a �lack of talent� for Brazil is a bit ridiculous.

4) France: They won the last Cup � which they hosted � in �98, but then followed that up with by winning the quadrennial Euro Cup in 2000 (the first time the Cup-holders have won that intensly-contested tournament). They are seemingly everyone�s odds-on favorite to repeat. Zinedine Zidane, who lead the �98 effort, is as good a player as there exists in the World right now. The playmaking midfielder will quaterback a potent attack featuring Thierry Henry � the top striker on Arsenal�s Premiership-winning squad. Questions linger on defence, but the general consensus is that as a whole this side is maybe even better than �98.

5) Italy: I don�t much care for Italy. They are the side generally credited with �teaching the world to play defence,� which, while it makes for superb tournament play, means a lot of those �we�re playing for a 1-0 win� types games that are known to cause consternation amongst nuetral soccer fans. Not that they aren�t talented, but that mostly resides in the defensive half, and their methodical style has seen them in the �94 final (losing to Brazil) and the 2000 Euro final (losing to France on a golden goal). Expect them to be a factor � not spectacular � but a factor.

6) Germany: While the National side may be at its weakest in a generation (they had to play a tiebreaking match against Ukraine to qualify) they are amongst the favorites purely on reputation. Plenty of talent, seemingly no chemistry, they are still capable of completely dismantling any team in the world, and can score in explosive outbursts. Despite a lack of success since winning Europe in �96, counting Germany out of any major championship is a huge mistake.

Group-by-group breakdowns (top 2 in each group advance)

Group A
France, Senegal, Uruguay, Denmark
1) France, 2) Denmark
Senegal is one of the �happy to be here teams� and Uruguay � who took the 5th South American spot in a tiebreaker from Colombia � plays a crushing, physical style, but probably doesn�t have the horses. Denmark isn�t filled with household names, but they won their European Group, and are a solid team. The second-place team in the group will almost surely be the winner of the Uruguay-Denmark match, which goes off opposite France vs. Senegal on the opening day of the tournament.

Group B
Paraguay, South Africa, Spain, Slovenia
1) Spain, 2) Paraguay
If anyone can figure out Spain�s history of World Cup underachievements, they would be hailed as a genius. They didn�t even get out of their first-round group in �98. They are perennial top-10 and the national league is one of Europe�s finest. Paraguay are a dynamic team led by their free-kick taking keeper, Jose Luis Chilavert. South Africa is essential a debutante, after a generation of an apartheid-fueled international ban, they along with debutante Slovenia have only been on the scene for 10 years.

Group C
Brazil, Turkey, China, Costa Rica
1) Brazil 2) Turkey
With the easiest group, if Brazil doesn�t walk through this, something is seriously wrong. The question is which rather undeserving side will inherit the #2 spot. Turkish players and clubs have become an accepted force in European Football. Costa Rica is only really a force in the CONCACAF region, and China is probably the least-likely team to achieve anything.

Group D
South Korea, Poland, United States, Portugal
1) Portugal 2) USA
The host country has never failed to advance past the first round, which should make things difficult for our side. Portugal is the hot thing in Europe right now (ranked 5th in the World), with 2001 FIFA player of the year Luis Figo, but he has been slowed with injuries this year. Poland gave a good go of it in qualifying, making this a tough group to call. Read my piece on the USA side below.

Group E
Ireland, Cameroon, Germany, Saudi Arabia
1) Germany 2) Cameroon
Ireland screwed themselves when captain Roy Keane left the team in a dispute with the coach. The Manchester United (the Yankees of the English Premier League) captain may be irreplaceable, and I�m not seeing a Ewing theory event here. Germany is always a power, and Cameroon are the reigning kings of Africa. Saudi Arabia rivals China as the least-likely team to achieve anything.

Group F
Argentina, Nigeria, England, Sweden.
1) Argentina 2) England
Take a look at this group, then look at Groups B and C. Uhh huh� This is the famous �Group of Death.� How tense are things? The Swedes� The SWEDES! Had a scuffle between some players in their training camp. Nigeria are the elite of Africa, and have had a good string of international success going back to �94 (including their U-23 squad winning the �96 Atlanta Gold medal). Argentina, or England, or BOTH could fail to advance and it wouldn�t be all that big of an upset. Sweden (despite their scuffle) is a closely-knit squad, devoid of raging egos, that plays solid D and went unbeaten in qualifying. Both Sweden and Nigeria would almost certainly be favorites for advancement in any other group.

Group G
Croatia, Mexico, Italy, Ecuador
1) Mexico 2) Italy
Italy are notoriously slow starters who always seem to make advancement dramatic. Mexico are usually sniffing the top-10 rankings, and US fans are all-too familiar with the side, who have built quite a rivalry with our boys. They have plenty of talent: a dynamic goalie and good strikers, and bone-crushing defenders. Ecuador probably qualified on the strength of their home-field advantage (high altitude) and are Cup debutantes � but it is difficult to write off any South American qualifier. Croatia were the toast of the �98 tournament, coming from nowhere to finish 3rd. They still have �98 golden booter Davor Suker, but I�m betting lightning doesn�t strike twice.

Group H
Japan, Belgium, Russia, Tunisia
1) Japan 2) Belgium
I don�t know what to think of this group, other than that it seems to have been assembled to see hosts Japan advance � not a weak group, by any means, but not really strong, either. Belgium have made every Cup since 86, and are led by superstar midfielder Marc Wilmots. Russia have a typically hotheaded group full of internal strife, and Tunisia seem too disorganized to expect anything out of them.

Round of 16:

1st E vs. 2nd B
Match I: Germany beats Paraguay


1st A vs. 2nd F
Match J: England beat France (whew� what a game!)

1st F vs. 2nd A
Match K: Argentine beats Denmark

1st B vs. 2nd E
Match L: Cameroon beats Spain (don�t underestimate African sides� Spain always chokes)

1st G vs. 2nd D
Match M: USA beats Mexico (I�d love to see this one� call me a hopeless dreamer)

1st C vs. 2nd H
Match N: Brazil beats Belgium

1st H vs. 2nd C
Match O: Turkey beats Japan (Turkey is surprise team of tournament)

1st D vs. 2nd G
Match P: Italy beats Portugal (unless Figo gets rejuvanated)

Quaterfinals

J vs N
England beats Brazil (I told you I had a hunch)

I vs M
Germany beats USA (what I�ve give for the opposite result)

L vs P
Italy beats Cameroon (good run for the Lions)

K vs O
Argentina beats Turkey

Semifinals

Argentina beats England (this would be a titanic showdown!)

Italy beats Germany

Final
Argentina (don�t cry for me!)

Four years ago, the USA arrived in France with by far the most talented group of American footballers ever assembled. They had survived qualification with a close-knit group of international veterans, a team relying more on grit than talent. In the month before their opener against Germany, Steve Sampson made drastic changes to the presonnel and tactics, introducing a bizarre 3-6-1 lineup he would end up regretting. The result was the Disgrace of American soccer, as they lost all three of their group matches, scoring one stinking goal, and finishing butt-ass last in the 32-team field. Sampson was quickly sacked, and players scattered back to their clubs with tails between legs.

Now under the more even-handed control of Bruce Arena -- USA�s most complete coach ever, with years of success at the college ranks, the lads enter the fray with an even more talented team, driven by a youth movement that Sampson unwittingly launched with his then-inexplicable lineup changes in �98.

The USA side had World-Class talent in goal (with Kasey Keller) and midfielder (with Claudio Reyna) in �98, but this year they bring Clint Mathis, who has made The Leap, Landon Donovan, Josh Wolfe, and Demarcus Beasely, all young, all talented, all potentially great scorers. They have the usual mix of internationally seasoned midfielders: Cobi Jones, who has over 150 appearances; Ernie Stewart, veteran of the Dutch league and MVP of qualifying, Reyna is back, and John O�Brien brings his Premier League seasoning to the table. Up front, veterans Brian McBride � a solid target man � and Joe Max Moore � who also plays in England � bring seasoning to the raw talent. Keller is back, of course, but may see his spot taken by Brad Freidel � yet another Premier Leaguer � who has been awesome as of late.

Of course, that leaves the defense. Arena�s insistence on sticking with left back David Regis will hopefully end after he surrendered goals to Italy and Netherlands in recent friendlies. It�s hard to imagine Jeff Agoos and Eddie Pope not manning the middle, and Tony Sanneh can be a big presence on the right side. Hopefully the speedy and exciting Frankie Hedjuk, who can�t seem to buy himself any playing time with Bundesliga giant Bayer Leverkusen, will man the left back spot.

Of course, the stalwart of the defense was center midfielder Chris Armas, who went down with a torn ACL against Uruguay in a friendly two weeks ago. He was one of those players that just WAS where you needed him to be. Filling his spot is the toughest choice facing Arena, but expect a �do it by committee� approach with Reyna and perhaps Stewart.

The first-round group presents challenges, especially considering Korea is host. Portugal brings an attack as good as anyone in the world, and the best approach may be to attack right back, hoping Mathis can continue his scintillating play of late. They are definitely the second-best team, on paper, in the group, but we never seem to do well against European teams, and Poland looks tough.

Success for the our boys will be defined as advancing out of group play � anything after that is just bonus. My forecasting is a little optimistic, to say the least, but there is NO reason to expect a disaster like �98.

My indoor soccer team is still undeafeted this season, although tonight we blew a 5-3 lead with 3 minutes left to tie 5-5, so it feels a lot like a loss.

Sports can be incredibly frustrating, even when you aren't playing poorly and haven't lost. I don't feel like I've had my "A" game the last couple weeks, and I don't really know why. Shots that were going in before aren't now, passes I was making before aren't connecting now. It's a minor thing, really, but I've gone from walking off the field after most games knowing that I was as good as anyone out there to wondering what more I can do.

Tonight I still had a goal (deflected off a defender) and set up another one, but I don't feel like I was as effective a playmaker, and my defense was lacking. I have normally been, throughout my soccer playing days, a defensive stalwart, but my role on this team has become almost completely offensive, and even when I hang back a bit, I find myself pushed up the field by the flow of the play and the postioning of my teammates. Not having that traditional defensive role to fall back into may be what is frustrating me, as tonight there were a coupe instances where I just didn't put myself into position to make the defensive play.

It's really all in my head, I guess, but I just know I can do more. I passed up a couple passes tonight, when I had good looks, and the shots didn't go in, so naturally I'm going to get on myself for not passing to the open guy. I can't say I'm slumping, because I'm still playing well. I've just been brought back down to earth a little, after playing just amazing for a few games, and then settling for a tie tonight. It's a stupid thing to be frustrated about.

How Star Wars got it's Groove back
or
Attack of the Clones is a great movie... learn to accept it!

I've had it with Star Wars negativity. I've heard enough of the "well, but"'s and other assorted bullshit. No More Dark Side. Remember what Yoda says. It's time someone started talking about what is GOOD about Attack of the Clones.

Sure, I'll acknowledge the obvious flaws with Episode II. There are 3-5 absolutely wince-inducing, I-think-I-need-to-puke scenes -- involving the "love story" -- and the movie wasn't exaclty filled with great acting and dialogue.

Hey, News Flash, Bucko: NONE of the Star Wars movies have been about great acting and dialogue (no one will ever confuse Carrie Fisher and Mark Hamil with great actors, and if you want to see what the phrase "Mailing It In" means, you'll watch Sir Alec Guiness as Obi-Wan!). If I want to see a gripping drama, I'll throw in a Pacino flick. The literary equivalent of Star Wars is comic books -- maybe you need drivel like "Shakespeare in Love" if you want great cinematic "literature." You know what else, I don't much care for "comic book" movies -- but I gotta love Star Wars, for the same reason ALL of us do.

We were all a Hell of a lot younger, more naive, less cynical back Then, in the days of the first Three, maybe we need to keep that in mind. The understory: mythology, mysticism, the Force, is always what has driven the series. It brings out the religion in those of us who aren't the least bit religious, the sense of good vs. evil in those of us who have grown ambivalent. Oh yeah, and as for those 3-5 unbearable scenes -- how many scenes had you thinking "that was cool." I count at least a dozen.

We've waited 20+ years, and then another two hours, for Yoda to wield his lightsaber, and if you didn't just about jump out of your seat when he did, you Just Aren't Human, my friend, and we simply Are Not going to be able to discuss this rationally from here on... maybe you should just stop reading now, okay.

So maybe it IS cheesy, so what. Are you going to tell me the first three Aren't. Okay, right. The best emoting we saw in Episodes IV-VI was R2D2 and Chewbacca. Chewbacca's agonized growl as Han Solo is lowered into the carbonite freezer thing, grabbed you at the core... and it was a Wookie, people -- a guy in an oversized teddy-bear outfit. And everyone loved Chewy. R2 could say more with few beeps and chirps that Luke could with 15 minutes of his whiney presentation.

Look, I'm not here to trash anyone. I just think we need to bring this down to the appropriate level. It's Star Wars. You've got to remember Why you liked it, What you enjoyed about it. Didn't we All want a lightsaber? Why the fuck are we complaining about the vagaries of the digital format? What the hell were we expecting?

If you want a life-altering experience, you might want to look somewhere other than your neighborhood Cineplex. Why is it that dozens of shitty movies get made, and seen by millions, each year, and no-one seems to worry, but if the latest Star Wars isn't the Greatest Thing Ever we think it sucked?

I enjoyed Attack of the Clones. I thought it was pretty damn cool. 'Nuff said.