I am sitting here, yet again, avoiding life. This is something I have been doing Far too much of lately, and it needs to stop, yet the more I promise myself I will stop doing it, the more I seem to do it.

I could, and should, be doing something like cleaning the house or looking for a job. Instead, I am just sitting here, and now it is after noon already. I can't shake the feeling that my life isn't something that is happenning, it is something that is passing me by.

I don't seem to make decisions any more. Instead, i sort of just remain indecisive until whatever it was just sort of slips by, gets forgotten, expires, or whatever. That is more or less what is happening to this summer, and the same thing that happened to the last two summers. Now it is the last day of July, and my life is slipping by (yes, I'm a poet!)

I have made real efforts to be productive this month, and at times have been quite succesful. However, since last Friday, with the notable exception of Sunday, I have been a useless blob. maybe I'll run downstairs right now and start cleaning... it needs to be done.